Thursday, August 16, 2012

Another Attempt at Keepin' it Real

This week has not been the greatest. In fact I have pretty much not felt like I had much of a reason to get out of bed. Don't worry yourself...I did and I've walked 9 miles so far, but life has seemed pretty pointless this week.

This is the week I would have been starting a new job.

This is the week I've had to be the go-to person for a lot of things concerning that job because everyone else is out of town. It's frustrating to be 'good enough' to fill in and answer questions and give guidance, but not good enough to be actually fill the position.

People keep thinking I need something to do. I keep trying to figure out why...it's annoying! NOTE: I am perfectly capable of finding things to occupy my time. What I need is the job God intends for me to present itself and then me actually get the job. The end.

I am not having a problem understanding that God has a purpose and plan in all of this. I get that. I am struggling with what to do 'in the meantime'. I'm struggling with being gracious towards all involved. I feel as though my 'making the most' of the situation has caused people to forget that just a few short weeks ago I was heart-broken (and still am).

I don't know when I will get over it. I am working on it. Each day is a little different. Some days are actually ok. This entire week has NOT been ok. My tolerance for people, in general, is really low. I am a little snippy and easily annoyed.

I don't like being in this place and yet, here I am.

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